DFC #87 |
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Image © 1998 Bil Keane, Inc. Distributed by Cowles Synd., Inc. |
Daddy, if he dies can I disect him?--tb
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I just don't understand it, first, when we were in Mexico, he makes Jeffy swallow those white, rubber sussages, and now he is trying to shake them out.--Zebra
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Okay Dolly, just like I told ya...sneak up behind Dad and PANTS him!--Doc EVIL
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Pssst, Dolly! That camcorder's running, right? We're one "child abuse" lawsuit away from our lovenest in Bimini, babe!!--anon
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If you kick him in the nuts real quick, we can take both of them out.--hpl
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I still don't understand! Why does Daddy WANT to be covered in vomit?--halaq
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They're performing an excerpt from the all-pedophile production of Swan Lake!--MechaGumby
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If Dad wasn't so cheap we could have a "real" swing set.--Tazabby
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Betcha I can give him a hernia when its my turn!--Tazabby
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Yeah, Jeffy ate a 50 this time. Dad says if he won't cough it up, he's gonna reach in the other end and *pull* it out!--anon
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Cool! It's just like Mortal Kombat! FINISH HIM, DADDY!!--Pope Rich
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And then St. Antioch of Keane raised the Holy Melon Grenade on high saying: "Bless this Lord, thy Holy Melon Grenade..."--knuckles
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The acid must be kickin' in...I'm getting some wicked trails off of Jeffy's feet.--Diggit
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Jeffy inhaled the whole tank of helium!--paTRICK heSTER
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He hasn't made a single basket yet, but it's still fun to watch.--Greg J
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Now we airbrush Daddy out of the picture, and the Weekly World News will pay us ten grand for our "levitating boy" photo.--Greg J
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I hope we get a new hair dryer soon. Jeffy and I get really dizzy from this.--Greg J
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Believe me, it works wonders! I always comb my hair with Jeffy's teeth!--Kurt L.
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"He's done this probably a hundred times, but the look on Jeffy's face when dad lets go is still priceless!"--zed-iculous
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"Okay, now I've divided the wall behind dad into a sixteen-square grid. Each square is five bucks. The payoff square is whichever one Jeffy's head hits when Dad loses his grip. Get the picture? And no, before you ask, you can't buy the ceiling. That's considered an invalid toss."--zed-iculous
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Hide, Dolly! Daddy's on another 'roid rage!--Jenna
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This is creepy. Jeffy passed away a week ago, yet Dad keeps offering him up to God, praying for a miracle.--El Vez
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Dad just hates to lose at tic-tac-toe!--Ethelred
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Dad had to hock the barbells. Again.--zazu
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Jeffy had 3 hotdogs and a hot fudge Sundae for lunch. This oughta be good!--zazu
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This is cool. Dad's drunk his ass and he's reinacting his winning touchdown for Midvale High!--zazu
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I hope you hid your 'llowance! Daddy's shakin' down everyone for booze change again!!--Vice Pope Doug
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I feel a much stronger sense of family bonding since we all started wearing uniforms ......--Vice Pope Doug
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Fifty bucks says this doesn't get him out of the coma...--Dofang
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No, me! It's my turn to ride the ceiling fan!--Rotter
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Didn't you hear? Dad got that job at the car wash! This time tomorrow we'll be eating! Eating, Dolly!--Rotter
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Dad! we already saw you do the supplex... let's see the bone-crusher!--Joe Batutis
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I hope dad sniffs me next!--Nat Fairbanks
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He made 35 feet with mommy. I'll bet he gets at least 50 feet with PJ.--Blackstone
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Laaaadies! and Gentlemennn!! For his next trick, the Amazin' Bil will attempt to swallow this boy whole without ralphing!!--kafka
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Spike him hard Daddy!--anon
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So many NAMBLA jokes, so little time.--DMW
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See, Daddy's great!! He uses Jeffy's ass to scrub those black marks off of the ceiling. Mommy would just use a scrub brush!--Bozo
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Watch this... I just taught Jeffy how to vomit on command.--Paul Roub
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I've seen dad eat human hearts before, but never like this! This is gonna be cool!--Kurt L.
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Actually, I'm the one who drank all dad's beer -- I just left the empty cans in Jeffy's room. The perfect crime! --Kurt L.
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WATCH OUT FOR THE...(thunka thunka thunka)...ceiling fan...--Adam Schiff
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Okay Dolly, go long for the pass!--Anastasia
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My tummy ache is gettin' worse! I bet I spew on Daddy! That would rule!!--Vice Pope Doug
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