DFC #44 |
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Image © 1998 Bil Keane, Inc. Distributed by Cowles Synd., Inc. |
"This bionic eye sucks," Jeffy thought. "It doesn't even make that doot-doot-doot-doot noise when I use it. Cheap government shit!"--zed
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No, dear, if you were anorexic, you'd be all skin and bones. The word you're thinking of is anamorphic.--Roy (educating and entertaining)
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Sweetheart, of COURSE you're as pretty as Kate Moss!--B.
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Damn it, Dolly!! Flesh eating bacteria is SERIOUS!!--Vanpool
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Here's your new adopted sister. Try and leave the skin on this one, Jeffrey.--willy
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You gave him HOW many tabs?--anon
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Jesus! Look at those legs! Ever heard of a Thighmaster?--ChapStick
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So that's why we're so short. We're missing several thoracic vertabrae.--RLW
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Focus, Jeffy! You must visualize the disruption of her chi patterns for the Dim Mak to work!--Greg J
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Forever practicing his new hobby - taxidermy, Jeffy speculated on how he would position his sister's skeleton before he reapplied the skin and stuffed it.--Ms. Impossible At Your Service
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Next time you touch my dope I'll rip the flesh off your bones and serve it for lunch.--anon
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You remember that experimental Kirilian film that shows your deepest fantasies? Try to think of where you saw it last! We've got to find it before that horrible DFC crowd does, or our reputation is doomed!--Greg J
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...and a THICK skull it is!!--BK
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Oops, too far. Rewinding...rewinding...stop! Theeeere. That bedroom door is little match for this imagination - I can see you naked any time I want.--BK
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Wow - Beauty may be skin deep, but ugly really DOES go clear to the bone!--rlogin
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Jeffrey Dahmer Keane! Look at me when I'm talking to you!--Paul Roub
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Jeffy's obsession with a skinless Dolly had finally begun to encroach on the world outside the panel.--Capt. phealy
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As the old lady droned on, all I could think of was Dolly's liver, some fava beans and a nice bottle of Chianti.--anon
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Bones? I always thought she was full of shit!--RustyN
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Sorry, we can't buy any more food until your father finds another job. We're just going to have to make some sacrifices as a family and...Jeffy? Are you listening to me?--Pastor of Muppets
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...and you let Jeffy eat ALL the mushrooms? Didn't you save me ANY?--paTRICK heSTER
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But what I really want to know, is why in the hell your brother has a balloon over his head with your skeleton in it!--kafka
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"Yes, Jeffy, Dolly has had hundreds of bones inside her at one time or another."--Tim Harrod
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No, not "bones," _boner_ . . as in "you put your _boner_ in your sister."--anon
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You know, this whimsical-misinterpretation-of-what-Mommy-says shtick is getting really lame.--DMW
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Jeffy began to wonder why Dolly had "child bearing hips" at the age of five.--jimkata
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Jeffy, stop trying to turn your sister into a member of your unholy legions of the undead!--Rich Coughlan
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"Soon..." Jeffy thought. "Soon my powers will have developed, and I'll be able to flay the living flesh from Dolly's body, leaving her as nothing but a bundle of wet, glistening muscles with a pony tail."--zed
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Jeffy, I'm going to pop open the access panel on the top of Dolly's head. Since this is your first attempt at repairing her, you may wish to refer to your internal schematics and diagnostics file before doing anything with her positronic network.--zed
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Jeffy's unusual mutant powers let him see through skin, but Dolly's hair was impenetrable.--Amber Dowlin
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After hours of Mom's inspired ranting, Jeffy was STILL unable to picture Dolly's melon-headed skull.--Boschcat of the Apocalypse
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"Now Billy, remember that in Jeet Kune Do, you must *visualize* the spine before delivering the crippling blow..."--The Sandman
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"Y'know", Billy thought, "that anatomy class has really fucked my sense of sexual fantasy..."--Zenmaster
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Years later, Jeffy would wonder if Dolly's extensive chemotherapy was in any way connected to his childhood habit of using his xray vision to try and see her underpants.--MechaGumby
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Because transparent skin would make Bil's weak drawing style even MORE apparent, that's why!--anon
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What the...? Those are rudimentary cervical vertebrae! Dolly really IS the Lindbergh baby!--Zooboy
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