DFC #274 |
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Image © 1998 Bil Keane, Inc. Distributed by Cowles Synd., Inc. |
"Ohhhhh...the LAST time we played Charades, HOW TO MAKE LOVE TO A BLACK MAN wasn't even OUT YET!"--Randall
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"Mom! Jeffy took my power word and GOT SATORI!"--Randall
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"Mommy! Jeffy's dressing me with his eyes!"--Larry Hastings
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Mr. Director! Jeffy looked down, and he's not falling! What gives?--Namgubed the Merry Elf
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Dr. Jeffy Doom's plan was falling into place. Once angry, she would become the Incredible Hulk, and with the mind-control ponytail in place, she would do his bidding!--Larry Hastings
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Beezelebub and Mephistopheles get sealed in the dimension of darkness. Will they escape? Find out this week on: Satan Kids!--Magus
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Oh Evil Lords of Darkness, I command thee to knock that shit-eating grin off of Jeffy's face once and for all!--Mattness
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"Well, I want to write my name in the snow, too!"--tv's Spatch
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Jeffy smirked as Dolly went on and on about her painful constipation...That's what happens when you get stoned and somebody feeds you a whole box of cornstarch, he thought gleefully.--Mycroft
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With God as my witness, I swear that I will go through puberty!--Blue Gargantua
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Dammit! You knew Godot wasn't gonna make it! I should never have made you that bet!--The Outsider
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Mommy! Jeffy told me that running a web site doesn't make me a god at all, just a computer literate geek with time on my hands! Make him stop confronting me with reality!--anon
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My God! I can't stand any more of this! First you spurn me for Billy and then you throw him off like an old overcoat for P.J. You chew people up and then you spit them out again... I loved you... d'ya hear me! I loved you--Riff-Raff
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A. Cuffed unisex sweater perfect for slouching around. Special stretch collar accommodates even the largest heads. Available in while only.--Gen. Sedgwick
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Dolly never could hold her breath long enough, so I held on to the head-inflation record for years.--Dan Jones?
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In this still from the Void scene from the original version, the shoddy matte work reveals a slight shadow under Jeffy's foot. In the Special Edition, this will be painted out by computer.--Ratman
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Jeffy, take us back to our dimension this instant!--ewhac
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MOM! Make Jeffy stop visualizing me nude!--anon
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In Keane Mythology, before the suface of Earth was fully formed, Jeffiny, God of smugness, was born fully grown (sort of) from a hole in the temple of Dolles, Goddess of PMS.--Riff
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"By god, you are right, my brother! I'm gonna take it straight to the man!" Jeffy couldn't help but smile as Dolly marched to her doom. Soon...soon the circle would be his again. "Good on ya, mate" he thought, his mind a dark, oily place...--Paul "Dante" Reed
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Dolly-el lashed out. "Damn you, Jor-el! I don't care how long it takes, we will escape the Phantom Zone and wreak our terrible revenge!" Meanwhile, Jeffy-El chilled out, knowing a steady stream of masturbation would ease him through the lonely centuries.--Shifter
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"I'm D. Dolly K./Rappin' dis place/Drawn to kill/Like a nine in yo face/Only one nostril/Jus' like my brudda/Come any closer/And I kill you, motherfucker!" "Word!"--Galahad
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Jeffy Keane. Dressed like a clown for sexual purposes. Talked his sister into posing for blow-up toys. Wore khakis.--Lore Fitzgerald Sjoberg
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"Let her rant about the price, thought Jeffy. She'll come around. They always come around."--Radio Show
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Dolly erupts in a rage when told that Jeffy's contract calls for her to either immediately leave the panel or deliver a line using the word "p'sghetti". Peachy Keane: A History of the Family Circus--Podbeing
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"Jeffy!! Levitation is Devil's work! Devil's work!!"--Scribe
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And when I find out who replaced the Nair with Rogaine, they'll be hell to pay! What's so funny, ripplehead?--Rossbear
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Jeffy's arduous quest for enlightenment - the hours of zazen meditation, the contemplation of koan, the reruns of Kung-Fu - had finally paid off. His perfect blissful serenity could no longer be disturbed. Needless to say, this pissed off Dolly no end. --the infamous tms
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Collect all the Keane Family Action Dolls, like Kung-Fu Dolly, and Pocket Pool Jeffy!--Stiles
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