DFC #232 |
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Image © 1998 Bil Keane, Inc. Distributed by Cowles Synd., Inc. |
Are my arms startin' to look like Tom Servo's?--Doc Evil
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After having risen from the grave Jeffy makes the mistake of coming to his old house to feed on brains--Mr. X
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Jeffy was running so fast that when Thel tripped him, he tumbled straight into the previous panel--Argyle
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Get out of the circle, Mommy! My new contract gives me four more 'exclusives' this month!--Jeffy Ovitz
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Jesus! Are *we* at a Renfair, too? The neighbor's house has a thatched roof!--Squire Jeffy and Maid Thelma
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You are Sarah Connor?--Jeffinator
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As the dead Jeffy reached for his next meal, Thel remembered the words of the macumba priest in Trinidad: "When there's no more room in Hell, the melonheads will walk the Earth."--Paul T. Riddell
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"I get to come through the front door? You DO love me more than Billy!"--Namgubed the Merry Elf
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Thel opened the door and in ran Jeffy, with the melon-eating hedge in hot pursuit.--anon
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"Hair on my palms! You said there'd be no hair!"--Tillman
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"...Didja ever notice that your hair, when viewed from the side, looks just like a bad silhouette of a short, uncircumsized penis attached to an obviously overstimulated ballsack?" From Really BAD DFC Captions, Volume 13--OM
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I. Got. Another. A. At. Stepford. Elementary. Mother. I. Will. Clean. My. Room. Now.--alanon
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In the later years, Not Me took to body-checking Jeffy whenever he entered the house.--Daneburger Shostakovich Ehrhardt
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* GYMKATA!!! *--Doc Evil
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Why didn't anyone tell me the guy from Jump Start is a cop?--Anastasia
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J to the E to the F-F-Y! The Keane rocketship blasts to the sky! I got more moves than Action Jackson! I'm everyone's favorite Anglo-saxon! JEFFY!--Mighty Owl
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Quick, mommy! Get me a kleenex... I can't reach my nose!--Chromepaperclip
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Jeffy refuses to accept the fact that his hypno-hair no longer functions.--alanon
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That Brown kid's dog is flying his house around the neighborhhod strafing enemy targets again! Dolly's down and she need's a medic!--I'm with Stoopid
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Thel lifted her leg the rest of the way back and punted little Jeffy into the grill a passing car.--Schmuck
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Jeffy's Oedipal fantasy had come true. Thel greeted him at the door shaven, wearing only a sweater and tennis shoes.--Schmo
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Congratulate me! I've set the record for most appearances in a one-panel comic!--J. Wally Thompson
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Thel was pleased; like most Nissan products, the robotic Jeffy was quieter, cheaper and easier to maintain than her old child.--phil
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Look, Mama! I can Sig Heil with both hands while goose-stepping! The Sudetenland must be returned to the Fatherland! - translated from Das FamilienZirk, 1938--Schickelgruber
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Sorry I'm late, has today's panel started yet?--otis
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Whoa! Those hips, those breasts - you ARE a baby machine--anon
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"WARNING WILL ROBINSON!! WARNING! WARNING!"--Lee Harvey
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Thel, brought to the brink of a complete breakdown from the stress of having only one breast in a breast-worshipping society, chose this day once and for all NOT to save Jeffy from the big kids.--Vice Pope Doug
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Satan really does have work for idle hands!--7 years in Babette
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Thel held back her sigh.Just like that movie Homeward Bound, Jeffy made it back from the coast. Next time she'll just have to break his scrawny legs. Repeatedly.--jedi mind trip
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Yesterday's goldschlager colonic took awhile but one hand-stand later I'm ready to shit lightning! Move, WOMAN!--Trevita Peron
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Mommy, it's not fair! Billy always gets to mutilate the squirrells first, just because he's older!!--Tony's Dancing Clams
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Now mommy, before I tell you anyhting, I want you to keep in mind that P.J was an unplanned pregnancy, and you're still a young and fertile woman.--Tony's Dancing Clams
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Th' blood won't wash off, Mommy! Th' blood won't wash off!!!--Doc Evil
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"I saw it! I saw it all! Real colors and textures! Sweet air and friendly adults!"--CAR
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Two open hands and NO beers...what's wrong with this picture?--R.J.M.
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Mommeeeee --- Gramma's scaring me!! She's naked again, an' says she's "conscriptin' me to serve on the Bismarck!"--Vice Pope Doug
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Mommy! If you distract those Colombian guys in th' BMW 750il racin this way, I promise I will never, ever EVER steal forty kilos of cocaine again!--Vice Pope Doug
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Thel continues to practise her profession even after being kicked out of her job at Wal-Mart...--Norman Swartzkopffarooskyawopbamboom
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and throw your hands in the air like you just don't care! The double dutch bus..the double dutch bus. seldom seen still photo from the failed 80's TV pilot, "The Rappin' Family Circus"--Radio Show.
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He was so cute playing "Invasion of the Jeffysnatchers" that Thel almost felt bad about having to sell him to the white-slavers for rent.--Schmo
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O! Mama! I have been frightened by a group of teenage ne'er do wells! Please, give them the scolding they deserve! --Mighty Owl
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Well, today in school, I learned quantum theory, how a singularity, or a 'black hole' is formed, dabbled in "imaginary numbers" and...ahh, fuck it. Pull my finger, dyke.--Skywise
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"Sleep! Sleep! I command you!....wait. Is the hypno-hair thing overdone? Not yet? Okay. Sleep!!!!!"--Medea
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<Insert a lame Frankenstein caption here>--Kevy
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