DFC #247 |
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Image © 1998 Bil Keane, Inc. Distributed by Cowles Synd., Inc. |
"So, yeah, we high-five each other like this after PJ finishes his solo number, and we break into the Carpenters medley. If this 'Keane Family Special' doesn't get ratings, it's capers and Top Ramen for the next month, so be cute like a fuckin' Chipmunk.--pony
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They shouldn't have giggled/ they shouldn't have laughed/ Keane kid revenge is badder than Shaft!--Mighty Owl
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Then you block their arm... like this... and that leaves their gut open for the "Disemboweling Iron Hand"... like this!--anon
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"Keep watching your hand, and when you start to see trails, that means that the acid has kicked in..."--Nicole D.
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"EL-BOW-SEX! EL-BOW-SEX! EL-BOW-SEX!" came the derisive cries during each screening of the Family Horror Circus Show...--Dan Jones
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Relax your eyes, Jeffy. Concentrate your chi. Leave yourself open to the beauty of the universe. Do you see the flow? The lines of the chi flowing between us? Good, Jeffy-san. You are learning well.--daniel is my celestine prophet
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Dolly, has removed Jeffy's mirror. While she was expecting a comedy bit, it didn't work out that way. Jeffy's apparent wonderment at having become a female is almost disturbing.--Marlboro
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"Ha! I just poured bleach in the bastard's vodka!"--Reed Spacer
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Gimme four!--OM
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Heck, I can't even reach the top of your head!--Namgubed the Merry Elf
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Yeah, it's pretty soft. I bet we could tear our way through the backdrop and escape!--Kevin Wayne Williams
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Grandpa's ghost has a big smile now!--Luna
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During their brief moment in the spotlight, Jeffy and Dolly became intolerable: "You da man!", "No, you da man!", "You da man!", "How can I be da man, when you da man?". I was the first to spit in their snotty little faces when their empire crumbled. -- Themla Keane: It Takes a Melon--Westur the Unspeakable
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Ah, Headhopper! You must be able to catch the finger before you can pull the finger! Soon, you shall be ready!--Vice Pope Doug, Raising Caine Dept.
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That's not a karate chop, but THIS is a roundhouse punch!--lysdexic
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"...two seconds later they accidently banged their funny bones together - HARD - and fell to the ground in writhing agony. It was, without exception, the funniest thing I have ever seen in my life." -- Thelma Keane: Guilty Pleasures--westur the Unspeakable
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Wonder twin power! Shape of... a decent, sober father!--nonentity
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Sick! Check out the negative space between the two happy children. That's a penis if ever I saw one.--Marlboro
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NOT this year's "Tickle-Me Elmo": The Keane Hand Puppet Set--Yakk
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The latest release of Mortal Kombat features new charactures, Dollina and Sgt. J. Keane, who are both adept at hand-to-hand combat and throwing short, but deadly, curvy lines at their opponents..--agm
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Good, Jeffy-san. Now show me "wax the vibrator."--alanon
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Wee made it through every Geena Davis movie alive, brother! --Mighty Owl
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Yeah! Our new wardrobe is old Star Trek Uniforms!--Skywise
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