DFC #373 |
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Image © 1998 Bil Keane, Inc. Distributed by Cowles Synd., Inc. |
"Okay, we've lived deliberately and seen what the woods have to teach. Can we get the fuck out of here now?"--Lloyd Dobler
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Warning: The following images may be disturbing to some. Discretion is advised. See for yourself the horrifying truth about open-net fishing. Trapped in this net by fishers seeking better catch, these poor creatures will slowly die. Won't you help? Send your donations to.....--The Dog
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No offense Mom, but I like it better when Uncle Roy reads us Penthouse Letters.--Anastasia
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"Hey, Ma, that Brown kid once got in some major trouble for a few bite marks on a tree. What do you suppose the EPA is gonna say when they find out your fat ass has got these trees about 10 degrees off of vertical?"--Darth Tigger
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Well, we can try it, I guess. Claiming squatter's rights may have worked for you back in Australia but I just don't think it applies to mall atriums.--bobo
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"I know you say there's no such thing as a pit chihuahua, so let's see you get down first, okay?--Paul T. Riddell
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PJ, stop playing with Mom's severed head already!--Mr. ?
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And now, the Family Circus will re-enact George Washington crossing the Delaware.--phil
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Just as Hirschfeld's fans know to look for the Ninas that he conceals within the panel, students of Keane's work will notice here the word "Help" repeatedly hidden in the linework.-- Crazy Climber
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"Modelling a hammock in front of a fake outdoor scene in a department store window is NOT my idea of camping out!"--anon
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"Mommy? Are you *sure* the hammock's assembly instructions say that we have to get greased up and climb on top of you to see if the nails hold?"--Behr
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This hammock used to support us...kind of like daddy.--R.J.M.
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I don't mean to startle you...but have you ever heard of the phrase ants in your pants?--R.J.M.
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I don't know what daddy was complaining about...you're doing a good job of going down...--R.J.M.
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"The hammock didn't touch the ground a few minutes ago," Dolly thought. "Is it just me or are the trees getting closer together?"--hangtownman
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Is Godot here yet? Is Godot here yet? Is Godot here yet? Is Godot...--(whatever that means)NME--
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Jeffy slowly rotated, displaying a nice selection of pies and cakes for all passebys to see.--Lots42
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"Fuck! I thought I was back on that fish!"--Lots42
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"I'm starting to miss the featureless void."-- Crazy Climber
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Hanging out with the guys in Basic Training finally came in handy for Dolly, who recognized the thinly covered Punji-stake pit from a safe vantage point. She'd let Jeffy get out first this time.-- Crazy Climber
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"I hope to God that the lump I'm feeling under my ass are your car keys!"--Jeffrey
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Mom, When dad said " Don't do anything til I get back" I don't think he meant it literally. Besides- isn't four days a long time for a beer run?--lefty
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Wow. For a snaggletoothed whiny little Lillith Fair bitch, that Jewel sure has some great poetry. Read us "Snow in My Vagina" again.--Smokey
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Somehow, when you said you wanted to be out in the woods lashed between two trees, I thought this would be a more exciting vacation.--Gen. Sedgwick
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"Mom, Dolly says there is too extradition to Oregon!"--nine elle
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Gee Mom, I don't see what Dad sees in this group sex thing, do you?--Ragnar the Hammer
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"So how long do you think it'll be until those damn process servers have left and we can go home again?"--Tempus Fugit, the Time Flier
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Damn, just how long is this Kama Sutra thing anyway?--dweezil
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"PJ was the first to go. We tore his limbs from his lifeless body and used the meat and marrow to sustain us for a few weeks. After that, Dolly and I consipired together to take Thel out, and her breasts alone fed us for a month. Well, you can imagine how silly we felt when we realized that the net had never closed up properly and we could have walked away any time we wanted to...." -- From Circles of Hell: The Decline and Fall of the Circus of Debauchery by J. Keane.--Sinister
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"Don't knock it. It's furniture."--Heath
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See how it sags when it has no support? Now do you get why we're embarrased at Parent-Student nights?--Nethicus
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Jeffy was blithely unconcerned. Dolly was hesitant, but still coping. But PJ could only bury his face in his mother's neck, eyes sqeezed shut against the unfamiliar excess of scenery.--hangtownman
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Dolly was perplexed by all the new foliage in the living room. Hadn't she just dusted in here yesterday?--hangtownman
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Not only does it sag, but it just hasn't smelled the same since Uncle Roy's last visit.--Peon
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"Is it a letter from Daddy? I miss him! Why did you have to leave him for Spiderman?"--Spoo Rancher
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Dad's lookin for his fishnet stockings .... and, boy, is he pissed!!!--Heckler
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High-pitched giggles came from the trees all around them as the net snapped shut. The Ewoks would eat well tonight.--Shem
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It was another boring day, then she saw it. A well drawn ear, just laying on the ground. She must get it before anyone else.--weewee
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If you look closely, you can see Billy in the background commiting suicide.--Lots42
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From the makers of Fly Paper: White Trash Paper.--Jamey Powell
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"PJ's not dead, mom, you're just holding the mirror at the wrong end."--Opti
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Y'know, Washington, DC, is sounding better and better.--Gen. Sedgwick
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Now will you pay for the liposuction?!--me, myself, I
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Desperately searching for a real, caring mother figure, the children begin secretly meeting with Betty Rubble.--m i n s q
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So then the son says, "I don't hafta run faster than the bear, I only gotta run faster than you." Now, there's a reason I'm tellin' this joke... --Sean Q
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Okay, Dolly, get ready to cut the tether! If my calculations are correct, we should make it out of this strip and at least to "9 Chickweed Lane"!--thx-1137
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