DFC #121 |
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Image © 1998 Bil Keane, Inc. Distributed by Cowles Synd., Inc. |
All right already! Mom bought deodorant for you and not me. Stop rubbing it in!--Rev. Reynard
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Sure, cheer. But remember the police won't pay to fix a car wrecked in a high-speed chase, even if the driver *was* killed.--Psychobear
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Did you eat that little picture of Mickey Mouse that I had in my backpack?--Jadie
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Sit your sorry ass down now! We're getting a new TV in Cartoon #123 and I want to enjoy this one while we can!--Bill Versteegen
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You smug bastard! They may not have found Rows 17 to 23 yet ,but the NTSB aren't idiots! They'll read the manifest and your scheming trail of lies and deceit will lead right to this front door! --Bill Versteegen
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You fucking bastard! Tell me who Keyser Soze' is during the opening credits will ya? Well, here's some news for ya! At the end of SEVEN there's this box, and it contains......--Bill Versteegen
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Look, it turns me on when John Travolta does that, but for the last time- YOU'RE NO JOHN TRAVOLTA!!!--the wonder cheese
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The Dance of Joy will not save you from the wrath of MY FINGER!!! Damnit! Aren't you listening to me? Do you know where this finger has been?!?!?--the wonder cheese
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STOP IT! Why do you have to do that every time the hunter shoots Bambi's mother?--Orion the Hunter
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Okay, second word was "am". Third word sounds like "smoking"...starts with "ch"...--Myke
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It's an old Jedi trick; Now, will you give me all your money or are you going to make me leave you hanging in the air until you die?--Myke
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I remember my first beer.--ChoppingBlock
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Will someone tell this moron that it ain't synchronized swimming if it ain't in the water??--Charlie Steinhice
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Sweat to the Oldies on your own time, asshole! It's almost time for "A Current Affair!"--Mr. Fabulous
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Mommy, he's receiving his "instructions" from the weather channel again. NOW will you get him tested? --anon
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That's not the way to do the Time Warp! Pay more attention to the guy with no neck!--His Imperial Majesty
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Enjoy your fucking touchdown, Jeffy. If my team doesn't cover the spread, it's the only scoring you'll do for a week!!!--Dave the Fave
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"Come on, Jeffy! Just because Dick Clark's the only person besides us who hasn't aged in forty years doesn't mean you have to watch "American Bandstand" every single day!"--Adam Cadre
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"Okay, enjoy the Sex Pistols reunion. But when Duran Duran and Missing Persons make their big comebacks, don't come crying to me!"--Paul T. Riddell
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That's IT! After "Saturday Night Fever" is over, I'm gonna make him sit through "White Men Can't Jump" and see if he gets the clue.--Dave the Fave
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I hate having to sit like this just so the TV reception comes in! Why can't Dad just spring for cable?!--Riff
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This is Jeffy on drugs. Any questions?--Riff
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Mommy, Billy is pretending to hang himself like Grandpa again!--anon
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Will someone please do the Heimlich maneuver on this bastard so I can watch my soaps!?--Coyote
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Mom, we are never, I repeat NEVER watching The Exorcist and Saturday Night Fever back to back again!--Toade
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Poe was wrong, Web Browsers. THIS is Jezebel in hell.--ThreeSwords Delamitri
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"Sweating to the Oldies" my ass... it's gonna be more like "Sweating to My Fist Down Your Throat" if you don't cut out that Richard Simmons crap, Jeffy!--Toade
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Why is it when he swallows helium he gets to float around the room...but when I swallow it my head just swells up more?!--Tazabby
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Stupid coyote. You let the Roadrunner got away again. Here's your money Jeffy, stop gloating.--Jan Keilek
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Hold it one damn minute there, Twinkletoes....your back doesn't seem to be as bad as you say. Tomorrow, you can drag Dad's drunken body in from the curb. --Tazabby
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You've been in my crank, haven't you?--Anastasia
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In the name of the Lord, I command ye evil masturbating demons to COME OUT!!--kafka
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If that's the ancient Navajo piss-me-off dance, it's working.--Diggit
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If I have to wear a goddamn dress, Jeffy shouldn't be able to do ballet.--Horselover Fat
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You can just kiss my ass! That guard was holding the tackle so tight he should have been banished to the B&D channel.--John Madden
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Mom, he's watchin Ru-paul again!--anon
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No, Jeffy, remember, OJ didn't choke her. You'll see in this part of the reenactment video....--Pastor of Muppets
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Is he the only one in this house that bet on Mike Tyson?--Rickshaw Billy
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I don't fucking get it. I've been in so many god damn cartoons and have done so many cute things and this little fuckface does one stupid dance and he gets 300+ captions.--Cheezo
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